Friday, August 13, 2010

Kick-Off

Welcome to my blog!  Here's the plan:

The Manifesto

  • No taking myself too seriously.  I fully intend to be professional on my official website (once it's up and running), but not here.  If I feel like posting a picture of myself riding a unicycle, then by golly, I'll do it.
  • Plenty of freaking out about the big scary world of publishing, because it's exciting and I have no idea what I'm doing yet, so why not invite an audience?  At some point I hope to be savvy enough to not wet my pants every time I get an email from my agent or editor, but until then, you'll be hearing about it here.
  • No pictures of cute little animals.  Unless they're feral and I'm chasing them out of my house with a hockey stick.  Please don't hate me animal lovers--we can still be friends. 
  • No nudity.  Scratch that.  Limited nudity.  If someone walks by me sporting some plumber crack, and I just happen to have my camera on me, it's going to end up on this blog.  You're welcome.
 

Yes, those are goggles.  I wish I had a good explanation as to why I'm wearing them to write.  I don't.  I'm just trying to prove to my husband that they are totally worth the $15 I paid for them at Target--see, I can wear them for work and play!  He thinks I got ripped off because he got a pair for $4 at T.J.Maxx.

Side note: I'm persona non grata at the Maxx after a certain three-year-old friend of mine peed her pants when I said no to a new Dora Backpack. 

What I'm Working On:

Book #1: VIRTUOSITY

Okay, so I'm not actually working on it right now, because it sold to Simon Pulse in May!  It's about a teenage violin prodigy who falls in love with her biggest competitor.  I should be embarrassed to admit this, but I'm sort of in love with my characters and their story.  I was actually sad for a while when I finished writing it because I missed them.  Umm, delusional?  Maybe.  I'm even looking forward to getting my revisions letter from my editor so I'll get to hang out with my "friends" Carmen and Jeremy again.  (Caution: this is what happens to people who wear goggles while they write.)  I'll be sure to post pictures of me opening my revisions letter, sobbing, setting myself on fire, etc.  Just kidding. 


Book #2: ???

Ah yes, my little title-less baby.  I'm writing away, falling in love with a new batch of "friends," this novel to be published by Simon Pulse in fall of 2012.  People keep asking me what it's about, and truthfully, I'd rather answer embarrassingly personal medical questions.  So if you're curious, just ask about the inner workings of my GI instead please.  Any time I cave and attempt to give details I hear the plot coming out of my mouth and think, Oh no!  This is garbage!  How did I ever think this was a good idea?  What am I going to do?  I should probably scrap it and start writing a paranormal dystopian romance between a leprechaun and a gargoyle instead. Then I have to talk myself off the ledge and remind myself that it's actually a good idea, and I do really love my story.  Frankly, it's exhausting.  So if you're not my agent or editor, go ahead and ask, but please don't feel bad when I mumble and change the subject.  And if you are my agent or editor, you should probably yell at me for not having a better response.  I totally deserve it.

What I Read In Canada:

I just got back from a six-week trip to the motherland.  Every summer I go to Canada when Florida gets so unbearably hot and humid that I start fantasizing about curling up in the freezer and closing the door behind me.  I got to read some stuff I've been meaning to for a while, some YA, some not.  This isn't everything, but the stuff I feel like I can recommend:



I need to make a confession.  I started and stopped reading two award-winning YA novels, both after about 50 pages and both for different reasons.  They will remain nameless because I'm a wuss and don't want to make enemies in this business before I've even made friends.  The first was nearly without plot (and I even like character-driven fiction, but this was toooo muuuuch) and the second suffered from forced dialogue.  I could hear the adult trying to sound like a teenager and I just couldn't make myself suffer through.

So, I guess my point is I don't always agree with the people giving those awards.  Unless they're giving one to me.  Then they're geniuses.

In Closing:

This is one mighty long first post, but I feel like I should finish off by explaining why cute little animals are not my friends.  This has nothing to do with writing.
This swam up my toilet.  My three-year-old daughter spotted it first.  We tried to catch it, but it swam back down, so I flushed the toilet about thirty times as if that was going to fix the problem.  Now, if that frog can swim up, what's stopping a snake, or a tiny gator, or a whole army frogs?  According to google, NOTHING!

Same frog in my daughter's closet ?  I don't know.  Looks bigger to me.  On the same day we also had a long black snake coiled up by our front door.  Sorry, no picture.  Far too much freaking out for that.

This gator lives in the lake behind our cul-de-sac.  I took the picture to impress my Canadian relatives, and they thought it was moderately cool, but not as scary as a grizzly.  As if they have grizzlies living right in their backyards.


Animal kingdom, what did I ever do to you?

13 comments:

  1. Wow. You have more wildlife in your area than in mine. I'm glad I live in an alligator-free area of Miami-Dade.

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  2. Whoa!! That's was one determined frog. I think alligators can be just as if not more scary than a grizzly bear depending on the circumstances and the size of the gator. I've never had an aggressive encounter with either but have hung out a bit with both.

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  3. People keep asking me what it's about, and truthfully, I'd rather answer embarrassingly personal medical questions.

    I hear ya! Feel exactly the same way.

    Welcome to blogspot!

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  4. Hey Jessica!

    Glad I stopped by today. I just moved from Louisiana, where gators lived in the ditch behind my backyard and in the bayou 1/3 of a mile from my front door. We had a cottonmouth slithering around our backyard in July. Once, before our fence was up (and before I knew the gator mama and her ten snapping babies were hanging out in the ditch), I spotted a bob cat bouncing around.

    It took forever for me to venture behind the house, you know, with the wild carnivores, and all, but this past spring, my boys and I picked lots of wild blackberries without spotting one critter (beyond dried up crawfish and crabs).

    I feel the same about cute animal pics. Whatever you do, don't visit my blog today, where I've done what I swore I'd never do: post a cute animal picture. I figured it was safe making an exception for my new puppy.

    Hooray for Elevensies!

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  5. Hi Jessica! I love your blog and your manifesto. And hey if the goggles help with the writing I'm gonna get me a pair :-)

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  6. What a fun blog...I'll be back for the fashion advice and partial nudity...I mean...well...

    I totally relate to being in love with your characters!

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  7. I have a general rule of thumb when it comes to decisions dealing with partial nudity. (I gleaned this little proverb from the pop-icon Illuminati, Whitney Houston.) "Crack is Whack!"

    Your blog will be genius fun - just what I love!

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  8. This is a great first post, Jessica! I have to say, the moment I saw your picture with a violin, you had me. I already love you. :) (this is from another violinist). And seeing all those animal pictures confirmed to me everything I suspected about weird, creepy crawly animals roaming around in Florida backyards!

    -sheela

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  9. You guys are great to comment on the first post! Ya make a girl wanna keep at it...

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  10. Yay, you're in the blogging world! So am I...check me out at areyouhappyareyouhappy.blogspot.com!

    You're hilarious by the way and your book sounds fab!

    Libby

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  11. I read the plot summary for Virtuosity and I'm a bit confused--where do the vampires fit into the story? Please update this post for clarity. Thanks.

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  12. Honestly Serge, do I have to explain everything to you? The vampires are implied. The vampires are always implied.

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  13. OMG! My biggest fear is that when I get up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, a snake is going to come out of the toilet. Now after your post I think I'm scarred for life!!! *Shudder*

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